THE OFFICIAL WEB PRESENCE OF HORROR / COMEDY / BIZARRO WRITER AND PUBLISHER NICK CATO


Monday, January 30, 2012

Powerful Chapbook


THE MILL by Mark West (2011 Greyhart Press / 39 pp / eBook cb)


West's chapbook deals with a group of people who meet to counsel each other over the recent loss of a loved one.  When Michael's wife Nicola succumbs to breast cancer, he begins having strange dreams that a counselor had warned him about.  He soon disdovers that Saskia (another recent widow) has been having similar dreams about a local place where an old mill once stood.


THE MILL is a depressing yet eerie ghost story featuring some sharp writing and a dark yet comforting ending.  Fans of Gary A. Braunbeck will eat this up.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Gangs, Monsters, and Robots!




THE CRUD MASTERS by Justin Grimbol (2011 Eraserhead Press / 81 pp / tp)


Eraserhead Press continues their 'New Author Bizarro Series' with this ode to gang novels and giant monster movies. 

Boogers is a member of the Crud Masters, a group of outcasts who live on Shelter Island. Among their colorful members are Snuggles (a beefy guy who likes to hug people) and Pussy Bear, a rich woman who spent all her money to make herself look like a bear. With boobs. 

Shelter Island also has a heavy army presence: it seems giant sea monsters (called Dagoons) keep coming ashore and causing trouble, the military doing what they can to control them. Rival gang 'NOLA' (comprised of the island's rich kids) becomes unstoppable when one of their members reveals his van can turn into 'Swagatron,' a giant robot. The Crud Masters plan a way to compete, and manage to trap and train one of the Dagoons, leading to a showdown between robot and monster. 

With cyborg threesomes, rampaging monsters, animal attacks, and plenty of laughs, THE CRUD MASTERS is a wickedly fun novella, featuring simplistic prose that reads like a YA author on crack.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

This Succubus Means BUSINESS!


PLEASE DON'T GO by Eric Dimbleby (2011 Pill Hill Press / 277 pp / tp)


Zephyr is a young grocery store clerk, dealing with the typical ups and downs of college life.  He's also planning on proposing to his girlfriend Jackie, both of them English majors.  One day he is assigned to deliver groceries to an old man who lives in an isolated house.  Charles Rattup turns out to be a writer who was once published in a classic anthology, quickly earning Zephyr's respect.  Charlie invites him to come back again, and the two develop a friendship built around literature and movies.


But Charlie begins to act strange, talking to an unseen presence, causing Zephyr to doubt the man's sanity.  But by the time he finds out Charlie isn't crazy, it's too late for Zephyr, as he is now held hostage by a sexually-charged entity that may or may not be the legendary Lilith, a demon common to many culture's folklore.


PLEASE DON'T GO is a clever take on ghosts, possession, and succubbi.  Dimbleby gives this one a truly unique flavor, along with a cast you'll care about and plenty of scenes filled with tension and dread.  The spirit controling Zephyr's life is as cunning as it is evil, slick as it is violent.  I was reminded of the film THE ENTITY only with a more brutal demon at play, as the torture she puts Zephyr through will get anyone's skin crawling.


This study of a man's desire to survive in the face of total hopelessness is also a genuine genre spook-fest, delivering the goods and concluding with a bit of a twist (and increasingly dreadful) finale.  Great stuff.

Friday, January 20, 2012

Flawed but Fun



DEVIL BAT DIARY by Peter H. Brothers (2011 / 221 pp / tp)


This mock journal tells the "true" story of what happened in a small American town during the summer of 1939.  The 1940 Bela Lugosi film THE DEVIL BAT was a watered-down version of these events, giving this book a "found footage" type of feel.


Chicago newspaper reporter Johnny Layton is sent to the small town of Heathville to get the scoop on the death of Ray Heath, an heir to a multi-million dollar cosmetics company.  Johnny is partnered with ace photographer "One Shot" McGuire, a "big-mouthed weasel" who Johnny can't stand.


It turns out someone is trying to kill off the Heath and Morton families with large killer bats.  The two clans are co-owners of the company, and Johnny Layton eventually discovers the bats attack those who wear a particular new brand of the companies' skin lotion.


Lugosi's character from the film, Mr. Carruthers, is here portrayed in a similar fashion, but some revelations on the "real" nature of other DEVIL BAT characters are quite funny.


DEVIL BAT DIARY is interesting for fans of the classic Lugosi film, but those not familiar with the source material might be put off by some of the goofy-sounding dialogue and an abundance of distracting slang (McGuire, Carruthers, and a local sheriff speak in heavy accents which the author spells out phonetically, which at times makes the prose a chore to sift through).


Flawed, but fun stuff for fans of classic monster movie fiction.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Now THESE are some Hot Lips...



DESIREE by Ken Goldman (2010 Damnation Books / 101 pp / tp and eBook)


Beautiful Desiree has an odd problem: whenever she kisses someone, they become infatuated with her and eventually commit suicide.  Her first victim is a young boy named Tommy who killed himself shortly after kissing her during a game of spin the bottle at a party.  Tommy's sister, Tamara, keeps her eye on Desiree over the years, discovering other men have met the same fate as her brother.


Goldman's novella bounces around time-wise and can easily be read in one sitting.  Although the author never clearly explains exactly WHY Desiree's mother's breast milk has given her this strange ability, it gives the story a nice mystery as we're never sure if Desiree is completely aware of what she's doing.  And despite the nifty ending, I found myself confused on a few occassions, but not to the point I was lost.


DESIREE is an interesting erotic thriller with a latent supernatural leaning that's definitely worth a look.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Bizarro From Across the pond


A HOLLOW CUBE IS A LONELY SPACE by S.D. Foster (2011 Eraserhead Press / 91 pp / tp)

Yet another offering from Eraserhead's 'New Bizarro Author Series,' this time introducing the world to UK writer S.D. Foster with 23 short-short stories, most having a fairy tale feel. 

Among my favorites are 'Matilda Goes Shopping,' about a robe-wearing woman who takes care of her obese brother. Her life is drastically changed when she's raped by a supermarket (yes...a supermarket); 'Slothra,' the sad tale of a has-been Kaiju star; 'Silk Flower,' a bizarro take on Pinocchio with an oddly touching conclusion, and finally, 'A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Chip,' where we meet a singing primate who learns he can't pay the rent in bananas. 

While a couple of stories are truly head-scratching, most of A HOLLOW CUBE is accessible without sacrificing the bizarro element. 

A decent and imaginative first collection. I'd like to see a novella or novel from Foster.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

An Engrossing Mob Story


SKIN GAMES by Adam Pepper (2011 / 190 pp / eBook)

After a couple of thugs burn her families' restaurant to the ground and kill two co-workers, Maria seeks revenge. She locates a mysterious man known as "Skin" but needs to be assured he's the right man for the job. Skin then tells Maria his life story, which takes up the majority of this engrossing mob tale from Adam Pepper. 

Skin's real name is Sean 'Shamrock' O'Donnell, the son of a tough Irish father and an Italian mother. When his father leaves them, Sean becomes the man of the house and does whatever's necessary to help support his mother. The rough streets of the Bronx lead him to a life of crime, eventually getting him involved with the local gangsters. 

Trouble starts at a mob party when bull-headed Sean becomes infatuated with Nicole, who happens to be the daughter of head crime boss Mario. They begin dating and quickly fall head-over-heels in love. Mario begins to send Sean out on set-up missions, hoping Sean will get the message to leave his daughter alone or be eliminated. But Sean proves too tough for his schemes. 

SKIN GAMES is a study of friendship, love, and the power of true self-resolve. Pepper's realistic first-person narrative makes this a compulsive page-turner full of gritty-violence, seedy characters, and a satisfying conclusion that will leave you thirsting for more. 

Similar to GOODFELLAS yet with its own voice, SKIN GAMES is a fine example of a self-published novel that's on par (or better) than anything in the crime/thriller genre coming from big house publishers. Mob fans DO NOT want to miss this.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

After 7 Years, MAYHEM Returns


LOST HOMICIDAL MANIAC (ANSWERS TO "SHIRLEY") by Jeff Strand (2011 / 175 pp / eBook)


The long-awaited 4th novel in Strand's Andrew Mayhem series finds Mayhem and his wife receiving news that they're about to become parents for the third time...only with triplets!  His partner Roger is finally thinking of proposing to his girlfriend on the day the bumbling duo open their own business, 'A/R Tasks & Investigations.'  That's right folks: Andrew and Roger have now gone legit in the attempt to officially try to help people who need their unusual problems solved.


The first day in the new office is slow, so the boys reluctantly take on an unrelated odd job to get the cash flow started. Tired, and just before they close for the day, a woman comes in seeking their help.  She claims that she might be a serial killer, and convinces Andrew and Roger to take her case.  They follow her to an abandoned house where she thinks--in her blacked-out states--she has killed people and buried their body parts.  Not wanting to run away if she snaps, she also convinces Andrew to handcuff himself to her as Roger begins digging under the floor boards.


From this point, it doesn't take long for the mayhem to get going..  LOST HOMICIDAL MANIAC then goes into a relentless, slapstick pace full of goons, killers, over-the-top violence, Strand's trademark sarcasm, and plenty of laughs.  One scene involving an old woman, a car chase, and hundreds of bullets had me in stitches (anyone who has read a Strand novel knows he has a way of making you laugh at the sickest, most insane things imaginable).  There's also a cameo that hardcore Mayhem fans will get a real kick out of.


Fans of the series will love seeing the boys back in action, as well as an old foe return for revenge.  Here's hoping we don't have to wait seven more years until the fifth adventure...

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

My Favorite Albums/Songs of 2011...

My four favorite albums of 2011 were GARY NUMAN's latest (of course), 'Dead Son Rising,' which continued with his modern hybrid of goth-metal synth-driven rock, including two great singles ('The Fall' and 'Big Noise Transmission').  There's a couple of forgettable tracks but overall a very well done release.

MASTODON's latest CD 'The Hunter' is as heavy and technically dizzying as anything they've done before, but with a new producer on board there's a fresh feel (mainly due to the vocals this time) on tracks such as 'Blasteroid,' 'Octopus has no Friends,' and 'All the Heavy Lifting.'  Drummers take note: Mastodon's Brann Dailor is basically thrash metal's answer to Neil Peart.  Amazing stuff here.

MICHAEL MONROE's 'Sensory Overdrive,' a non-stop barrage of hard rock/punk type short blasts of pure energy, featuring the killer tracks '78,' 'All You Need,' and 'Got Blood?'  I caught Monroe's band twice in 2011 here in NYC and they're one of the most exciting live acts out there.  Much heavier and just BETTER than most of what he did with HANOI ROCKS...check it out.

KRISTEEN YOUNG also released yet another amazing ep, this time featuring lyrics told from the viewpoint of characters from her favorite classic films.  The title track, 'Now I'm Invisible,' and 'Imitation of Life' display her originality, diversity and skill as both a vocalist and keyboardist.  'Imitation of Life' turned out to be my favorite song of 2011...check it out below---CRANK up your speakers and enjoy.  The lyrics in the 2nd verse are amazing.


Monday, January 9, 2012

NOT so Easy Riders


CARNAGE ROAD by Gregory Lamberson (to be released April 3, 2012 by Print is Dead / 86 pp / tp and eBook)


Every time I say I’m tired of zombie stories, I seem to read one that proves the subgenre is simply here to stay.  CARNAGE ROAD is a fine example of why: part EASY RIDER, part DAWN OF THE DEAD, this quick novella features two biker buddies, Boone and Walker, who decide to take a cross-country trek when the rest of their gang, the Floating Dragons, abandon their Buffalo, NY compound when a gang of rogue cops kill half their members.  Boone always wanted to see Hollywood, and convinces Walker to go with him—Walker had recommended trying Canada, but the cold weather didn’t appeal to Boone.


The story wastes NO time getting to the undead action.  Along the way our anti-heroes encounter both sane and insane religious zealots, manage to take in a movie at an abandoned Indiana theater, are arrested in Kansas by racist political extremists, all the while battling hordes of cannibalistic cadavers and burning rubber on their hogs.  The boys also come across the most imaginative group of zombies I’ve read in some time at the foot of a twelve-story building.  When they finally reach Hollywood there’s a hysterical scene where undead celebrities are spotted.  When they realizing there’s just too many zombies around, they decide to head to Texas, where they join a group of survivors at the Alamo.


CARNAGE ROAD may be brief but it’s packed to the gills with brain-splattering zombie goodness, social commentary, a bleak apocalyptic ending, and good old-fashioned b-movie-style fun.  Zombie fans will love it.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

The Devil Inside...


This week I guest review with L.L. Soares over at CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT, where we discuss the new possession film THE DEVIL INSIDE, including its controversial ending that has been pissing a LOT of people off.  Be warned of heavy spoilers...

Friday, January 6, 2012

A Classic Well Worth Revisiting


GHOST STORY by Peter Straub (1979 Simon & Schuster / 2011 edition by CM & G, Inc / 483 pp / hc)

While at its core it could be considered a revenge story, Peter Straub’s 1979 classic GHOST STORY is so much more.  From its mysterious road trip opening to stories told by the old men of the Chowder Society, Straub sets up an incredibly atmospheric tale set in Upstate New York.

Fifty years after a group of men accidentally kill a woman named Eva Galli, they meet to tell ghost stories as the well dressed, whiskey-sipping “Chowder Society,” but never mention Eva.  They begin to have spooky, prophetic dreams, and when one of them dies at a party given in honor of an actress, the novel begins its slow but tension-filled climb into surreal terror that—in time—will haunt you like few other novels can.

The story is given even more depth when author Don Wanderely comes into play in the second section.  His recollection of meeting a strange woman named Alma Mobley during his college years and what transpires between them and his brother David will hold you transfixed, and when Don becomes a part of the Chowder Society, the mysteries of GHOST STORY begin to reveal themselves at a slow but gripping pace.  Straub staples such as supernatural doorways and personal destinies (used in later novels such as IN THE NIGHT ROOM and A DARK MATTER) are premiered here, and I was happy to be reminded that they’re used uniquely in each novel.

I first read GHOST STORY in 1982 when I was a freshman in high school, and having just revisited it after all these years I can say without a doubt it is one of the finest horror novels ever written.  Straub comes back to his odd opening during the final pages, seamlessly tying everything together yet keeping an air of mystery that works as a prime lesson for anyone studying the craft of writing.  With its lush characters and ever-present sense of impending doom, this is one ride every horror fan should make a point to take at least once.

I’m sure I’ll be going for my third…

Monday, January 2, 2012

Why My 2011 ROCKED...

Despite the loss of my ultra-cool mother-in-law and continuing to have to work underneath a culture-less drug addict at my day job, 2011 was a GREAT year for me.  Here's my list of just WHY 2011 was so cool:



For the first time since losing the pooch of my childhood back in 1984, I FINALLY became the owner of a cute mini-dachshund we named HERSCHELL (yes, after infamous horror film director Herschell Gordon Lewis!).  Can't believe how much I missed being a dog owner.

~~~


In September, I got to meet director John Waters at the Horrorfind Convention in Gettysburg, PA.  I've been a fan since seeing PINK FLAMINGOS when I was 16 years old on VHS!  (I was also on the BIZARRO panel and did a reading with the hysterical James Roy Daley).

~~~

I FINALLY got to see two films from H.G. Lewis on the big screen: one of my all time favorites, BLOOD FEAST (1963), played at the Anthology Archives as part of a Lewis retrospect, and THE WIZARD OF GORE (1970) was featured at the Museum of the Moving Image as part of their "Magicians on Film" series.

~~~


Since 1981, I've been RAVING over Romano Scavolini's gross (and grossly under-seen) slasher film NIGHTMARE.  It FINALLY came to DVD thanks to the folks at CODEREDDVD.  PLUS:  I represented the film in Dark Scribe Press' HUGE tome on slasher films,  BUTCHER KNIVES AND BODY COUNTS (see pic below).  Both the film and the book were released over the summer.

Order a copy here!: BUTCHER KNIVES & BODY COUNTS
~~~


My good friend Sheri treated me to my first ECHO AND THE BUNNYMEN concert, a band who I always meant to see but for whatever reason never got around to it.  They played their first two albums in their entirety, then did a set of mixed classics.  They're one of the few bands who don't need a stage show or any kind of stage antics to give a GREAT live performance...the music does all the talking.  'Loved it.

~~~


Not only did Alexandro Jodorowsky's amazing SANTA SANGRE finally come to DVD, but I attended a cool screening of the film in January.  Severin's DVD features loads of nice extras, and the blu-ray edition looks and sounds incredible.

~~~


2011 was THE year I think I saw more films I had always wanted to but never had the chance, and FINALLY getting to see Takashi Miike's ICHI THE KILLER on the HUGE screen at Lincoln Center's Walter Reade theater was an amazing experience.

~~~


Likewise, Sam Fuller's once banned WHITE DOG screened at midnight at the IFC CENTER, and while I found it a bit disappointing, it turned out to be an ANTI-RACIST film, despite what early reviewers may have thought.  Was nice to see this after reading about it a zillion years ago in an early issue of FANGORIA.

~~~

My writing went well, as I also sold a novella, THE APOCALYPSE OF PETER, to Damnation Books (to be released June 2012) and also sold a Lovecraftian tale to a forthcoming anthology. I was invited to write for 3 other anthologies, and so far I have one confirmed sale (which I can't announce yet) and 2 others still waiting in the wings.  I'm also in the middle of writing my third novel, another novella, and am about 22 chapters into a novel titled THE HOUSE OF EXORCISM which I'm writing with my good friend L.L. Soares.  My SUBURBAN GRINDHOUSE MEMORIES column over at the CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT site passed its 40th installment...

~~~
I was also part of one of the COOLEST graduating high school classes back in 1986 (New Dorp High School in Staten Island, NY), and we celebrated with a 25th anniversary that was a lot of fun.

MOST amazingly, on 11/9/11, my wife Maria and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary.  We're both still trying to figure out how this has happened...



Here's hoping a GREAT 2012 for all those reading this blog!  

Sunday, January 1, 2012

My Reads for 2011

And we have an ALL TIME RECORD of 93 books read this year...in 2012 I am planning to take it easy and get some more writing done.  My top ten are highlighted in red.



1) BAD MAGIC by Steven Shrewsberry and Nate Southard
2) DEAD EARTH: THE VENGEANCE ROAD by Mark Justice and David T. Wilbanks
3) DARK STARS RISING by Shade Rupe
4) THE BROTHERS CRUNK by William Pauley III)
5) FILM ALCHEMY by C.W. Curry
6) THE MAD & THE MACABRE by Jeff Strand and Michale McBride
7) OUT OF THE DARK by David Webber
8) DEADLY NIGHTLUSTS by John Everson
9) DEATH'S DISCIPLES by J.R. king
10) SATAN'S MIRROR by Roxanne Smolen
11) THE EXORCISM OF ANGLE GRAY by Norman Thaddeus Vane
12) NAPIER'S BONES by Derryl Murphy
13) THE DREADFUL DOCTOR FAUST by K.H. Koehler
14) FANGBOY by Jeff Strand
15) THE SORROW KING by Andersen Prunty
16) TO EACH THEIR DARKNESS by Gary A. Braunbeck
17) SPORE by John Skipp and Cody Goodfellow
18) WILD by Lincoln Crisler
19) ENGINES OF DESIRE by Livia Llewellyn
20) THE ULTIMATE PERVERSEITIES by Kurt Newton
21) EUTOPIA by David Nickle
22) TALES FROM THE TORCHLIGHT INN (v/a)
23) DYING TO LIVE 3: LAST RITES by Kim Paffenroth
24) THE GERMAN by Lee Thomas
25) DEATHWATCH by Lisa Mannetti
26) EVERY SHALLOW CUT by Tom Piccirilli
27) OLD MAN'S WAR by John Scalzi
28) IN LAYMON'S TERMS (v/a)
29) CONFESSIONS OF A ZOMBIE LOVER by Zoe E. Whitten
30) PRAY TO STAY DEAD by M.J. Cole
31) A LIFE ON FIRE by Chris Bowsman
32) TORMENT by Greg Chapman
33) UNEARTHED by Gina Ranalli
34) THE NOBODY by Tom Piccirilli
35) BLOOD BORN by Matthew Warner
36) BLEED by Ed Kurtz
37) DIAPHYONOUS by Roy Booth and Thomas Riley
38) ENTOMBED by Brian Keene
39) THE ARMAGEDDON CHORD by jeremy Wagner
40) SENSATION by Nick Mamatas
41) LET IT BLEED by S.L. Schmitz
42) NIGHT JACK by Tom Piccirilli
43) IMPOSSIBLY FUNKY by Mike White
44) COSMIC FORCES by Gregory Lamberson
45) MISTIFICATION by Kaaron Warren
46) RULE 34 by Charles Stross
47) IT'S FOR YOU by Keith Minnion
48) KIN by Kealan Patrick Burke
49) USRA MAJOR by John R. Little
50) DARK SURGE by Gina Ranalli
51) HUNTING THE MOON TRIBE by David Agranoff
52) ILL AT EASE (v/a)
53) SWALLOWED BY THE CRACKS (v/a)
54) MIDNIGHT MOVIE by Tobe Hooper
55) SAMSON AND DENIAL by Bob Ford
56) THE DRIVER'S GUIDE TO HITTING PEDESTRIANS by Andersen Prunty
57) BESTIAL: WEREWOLF APOCALYPSE by William Carl
58) BLIGHT by Rick Rostow
59) A BLEAK MIDWINTER by A.R. Sellars
60) FOR EMMY by Mary SanGiovanni
61) HEART OF GLASS by David Winnick
62) INHERENT DARK by T.J. Brown
63) THE BONE WORMS by Keith Minnion
64) SHOCK VALUE by Jason Zinoman
65) TATTERED SOULS (v/a)
66) HELLHOLE by Brian Herbert and Kevin J. Anderson
67) ANNA DRESSED IN BLOOD by Kendare Blake
68) ROUGH CUT by Brian Pinkerton
69) FOXY by Pam Grier
70) WALKING WONDED by Robert Devereaux
71) THE NEIGHBORHOOD by Kelli Owen
72) SACRIFICE by Wrath James White
73) KARAOKE DEATH SQUAD by Eric Mays
74) KING'S WAR by Maurice Broaddus
75) THE CREEPING KELP by William Meikle
76) THE YEARS OF MAGIC by J. Lydon Hickman
77) DEVIL'S DRUMS by Vivian Meik
78) IDOLS & CONS by S.S.  Michaels
79) HIP POCKET SLEAZE by John Harrison
80) THE BLOODY REIGN OF SLAYER by Joel McIver
81) BENEATH CONTEMPT by Jack Stevenson
82) DEVIL TREE by Steve Vernon
83) MAL CONTENTS (v/a)
84) THE NOCTUARY by Greg Chapman
85) THE RED EMPIRE AND OTHER STORIES by Joe McKinney
86) RETURN TO DARKNESS by Michael Laimo
87) BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE APOCALYPSE DONKEYS by Jordan Krall
88) THE MAN WHO MADE MANIACS! by Jim Harmon
89) THE BRAINPAN CONCERTO by Kurt Newton
90) EDDIE TRUNK'S ESSENTIAL HARD ROCK & HEAVY METAL by Eddie Trunk
91) ENORMITY by W.G. Marshall
92) NO REGRETS by Ace Frehley
93) CROOKED HILLS by Cullen Bunn