Now Here's a Funny One...

GATOR A-GO-GO by Tim Dorsey (2010 William Morrow / 336 pp. / hc)

Dorsey's 12th novel (and the first I've read from him) is basically a Carl Hiassen-ish yarn set within an 80s "Spring Break" type of film, and regardless if the reader loves or hates it, one thing can't be argued: GATOR A-GO-GO is wickedly funny (and surprisingly violent).

Serge and his side-kick Coleman are enjoying spring break festivities in Panama City Beach when Serge follows a sign for free pancakes. As he swtuff his face, a group of church youths attempt to convert him, but they end up following succumbing to his wisdom and follow him on an adventure none of them would ever had expected. Before long Serge and Coleman also find themselves protecting college student Andy from a ruthless gang who (for some reason) are out to kill him. Double and triple crosses abound as both the Feds and a drug gang close in; our beer-guzzling, bong-toking duo (along with their new posse) manage to (unknowlingly) escape the clutches of both until a final showdown at Fort Lauderdale.

GATOR is packed with several hysterical antics (a couple of scenes involving a bungee-bubble ride are a riot) and some extreme partying even Jeff Spicoli would be impressed with (all the more funny as Coleman and Serge--out of place age-wise among the much younger college kids--are the ring leaders).

From it's rib-tickling opening line until it's satisfying conclusion, GATOR A-GO-GO is a real blast that brought me back to the teenage T&A comedies I grew up on during the 80s. I'm looking forward to reading more from Dorsey.

CITIES OF NIGHT by Philip Nutman (2010 Chizine Publications / 238 pp. / tp)

Bookended by a short & sweet 2-part apocalyptic thriller, this collection of ten stories by Philip Nutman (author of my all-time favorite zombie novel, WET WORK) features 7 reprints and 3 originals, each different from the other.

After the opening section of 'Unearthly Powers,' 'Full Throttle' is a nihilistic speed-ball of a tale that will surely get your blood pumping, while "Pavlov's Wristwatch' is a creepy (and humorous) ode to Peter Pan. If you're a film fan, 'Churches of Desire' will most likely strike a chord you didn't know you had.

'Memories of Lydia, Leaving' is a dark study of grief and suicide, while 'Blackpool Rock' was one of the more interesting (and funny) Elvis-impersonator tales I've read in quite some time. 'Ponce De Leone Avenue' visits a similar theme as 'Lydia,' and the older music-fan-confronts-younger-music-fan scene is priceless.

My favorite here is 'Still Life with Peckerwood,' a ghost story told from the point of view of a painting (this one was co-written with Anya Martin for an "Ultimate Haunted House" anthology). 'Love Sells the Proud Heart's Citadel to Fate' is a pre-Van Helsing story set in 1861. It's a traditional horror tale featuring missing children, a demonic cult and one wicked monster. 'A Mother Cries at Midnight' is pulled from HELLBOY: ODD JOBS, so if you're a fan of the red-skined demon you'll probably enjoy Nutman's take on him.

While a couple of stories here may be for aquired tastes, CITIES OF NIGHT is a solid collection and a fine introduction for those not familiar with the author. Slick cover design by Erik Mohr.

My 2nd column posted @ CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT

Over 20 years before Brian Keene's THE RISING and 10 years before Philip Nutman's WET WORK, zombies ran, shot machine guns, and sliced off boobies with knives and ice picks. Check out this review of my 1983 screening of CITY OF THE WALKING DEAD!

http://cinemaknifefight.wordpress.com/2010/04/15/suburban-grindhouse-memories/

Blatty Digs Deep

DIMITER by William Peter Blatty (2010 Forge / 302 pp. / hc)

Blatty's mind-twirling mystery revolves around the elusive title character, a dead body found at the site of Christ's tomb, and an Arab Christian detective named Meral who attempts to piece these (and several other occurences) together in the wake of his recently-deceased wife and daughter.

After a violent (yet wonderfully written) opening scene in 1973 Albania, the story shifts a year ahead to Jerusalem, where we're introduced to Dr. Moses Mayo and a couple of other offbeat characters (including Meral's possible love-interest, nurse Samia). As detective Meral investigates and interviews everyone and anyone connected to Dimiter, the story builds a great sense of dread; the back drop of a war-ravaged country cleverly adds to the novel's overall darkness, as do constant hints of spirit-searching (it's painfully obvious--even before reading the author's end note--that this was an incredibly personal novel for Blatty to write). DIMITER then turns into a spiritual-thriller on a level far deeper than most mainstream fiction offerings.

While certain chapters beg to be re-read (some a couple of times), don't let the twists and (then) unclarity turn you off: in the end, MOST of Dimiter's story is unraveled, and what isn't explained adds to the mystique and almost begs you to re-visit the whole novel as soon as you've finished.

While not anywhere near as scary as (or anything LIKE, for that matter) THE EXORCIST (or it's underrated sequel, LEGION), DIMITER is chock-full of suspense and wonder and should leave anyone looking for an engaging novel quite satisfied.

Now if only Blatty could come out with one this good a bit more often...

Elves, Bullets, and a Hi-Jacked Holiday!

THE SANTA THING by Robert Freese (2009 StoneGarden.net Publishing / 56 pp. / cb)

Gun-toting mercenary Franklin is called to Santa's castle when his elves report the Big Guy has been acting strange. Before you can say the third HO!, we're bombarded with zombie elves, alien parasites, mutant reindeer, and arguably the most demented Santa Claus this side of sanity. Freese's brief tale doesn't waste any time bringing the fun; it's a gore-filled, monster-infested holiday horrorshow you won't be seeing turned into a network special anytime soon, and works quite well as a double-feature read with Carlton Mellick III's equally-as-short (and insane) SAUSAGEY SANTA.

This genre-spanning chapbook is a real hoot and a half.

BREAKING NEWS! Werewolves Wage War on NYC!

THE FRENZY WAY by Gregory Lamberson (to be released 6/10 by Medallion Press / 356 pp. / tp)

Anthony Mace, the captain of a NYPD homicide squad, gained popularity after nabbing a high-profile serial killer. A film was made from a book about the case, and he's now easily recognizable...which makes it tricky when he's working out in the field. And his latest case is a doozy: a body is found decapitated and shredded to pieces. Then another is discovered left in a similar manner. Bodies start to pile up while unusual words are left at the scene of each crime. While Mace can clearly see the evidence pointing to some kind of creature, his superiors (and fellow workers) refuse to believe they're facing anything other than a demented psycho (or psychos). But when Mace witnesses the creature killing someone for himself, he goes before his bosses and gives testimony, not caring what they'll think. Refusing to recant, Mace is suspended, but continues investigating the murders and seeking the elusive creature on his own, aided only by a woman who runs a strange bookstore down in Greenwich Village.

While THE FRENZY WAY is a violent, action-packed old-school horror story, it also works well as a police procedural (and not too technical, which helps the story to keep its quick pace without all the forensic psychobabble that slows down mainstream novels of that genre). Lamberson takes a couple of unexpected directions with his characters, creates some genuine tension and thrills, and best of all (being this is a werewolf novel), delivers werewolves (and one rogue wolf) who you'd never want to meet in a dark alley (i.e. they're actually SCARY). There's plenty of latent social commentary, interesting American Indian history and folklore thrown in, and a fine back-story dealing with an ancient battle between the wolves and a secret Catholic order.

Lamberson's monster-mash is an excellent addition to the current rise of werewolf fiction; I'm not a big werewolf fan, but when a story is spun this well, I don't care if the creature-in-question is a mutated guinea pig. THE FRENZY WAY is a rip-roaring, bloody-good time that you'll read in a sitting or two. Don't miss it.

(NOTE: This review will also appear on or around May 1st, 2010 in THE HORROR FICTION REVIEW: http://www.freewebs.com/hfrzine/)

New film Column now LIVE

For my first installment, I revisited a very unusual experience at a "teenage-comedy" double feature...

http://cinemaknifefight.wordpress.com/2010/04/01/suburban-grindhouse-memories-giselle/