Slug Attack, Part 4!

ORPHAN'S ALLIANCE by Robert Buettner (2008 Orbit / 308 pp / mmp)

Jason Wander has come a long way since earth was attacked by skyscraper-sized projectiles back in ORPHANAGE, the 1st book of this series. We've seen him go from a typical teenager to the commander of the military; he's fought (and conquered) countless Slugs and has dealt with politics that would make the Bush administration blush.

Now, in Buettner's 4th installment, Earth's Army joins forces with humans from two other planets in an attempt to stop another slug-invasion, this time on a barren rock-planet, code-named 'Mousetrap.' By figuring out how to jump through black-hole-like folds in space, the humans are finally able to (nearly) keep up with the quick travel tactics of the Slugs. And the possession of Mousetrap is crucial in deciding how far the Slug war will go.

As with the first 3 books, ORPHAN'S ALLIANCE features exciting battles, awesome technology (wait 'till you get a load of the new fighter ships known as 'Scorpions,'), and plenty of political hi-jinks, this time with Jason Wander actively involved. Mimi, Munchkin, and Wander's godson Jude are all back, although Jude seems to be taking a turn that wouldn't have been approved by his late father. Wander's spider-like robot Jeeb has also been recharged and ready to get back to work.

While a couple of slow scenes keeps this out of the non-stop realm of ORPHAN'S JOURNEY (Book #3), ALLIANCE is still a satisfying episode, and further establishes Jason Wander as a future military commander men like General Patton would've been proud of (in fact, Wander's musings throughout the novel act like nifty little history lessons).

This is testosterone-fueled military scifi full of cool creatures, tech-savy combat, and an ending centered around an impossible-rescue that'll keep you hungry for ORPHAN'S TRIUMPH, the next in the series.

Gypsies 'N Curses

THE GENTLING BOX by Lisa Mannetti (2008 Dark Hart Press / 307 pp. / tp)

I'm not a fan of historical novels, even if they fall within the realm of horror. When I received Lisa Mannetti's debut novel and read the back cover's synopsis, I must admit I had NO interest.

But then I read a few positive blurbs by authors such as Edward Lee and J.A. Konrath, so I figured I'd give it a shot (not to mention I haven't read a horror novel dealing with gypies in recent memory).

By the 5th section of Part One (which is on page 27), Mannetti had me hooked; it was apparent she had gone to some great lengths to research her subject (and if she didn't, more power to her!), and even at this early point in the story I was interested and looking forward to the coming unraveling of our three-member gypsy family, who are seen early on traveling through Hungary in 1864. We are taken back a year to see why they're in their current predicament, and (trust me on this one), I doubt anyone will be able to put this one down.

Although our main gypsy Imre surely has his hands full, dealing with curses and other supernatural elements on top of trying to be a provider for his family (who is wonderfully brought to life by the author), it's the scenes of his wife Mimi and daughter Lenore being haunted by the ghost of a witch named Anyeta that give THE GENTLING BOX its more memorable horrific moments, especially much of what begins to happen during Part 3; there's some genuinely spooky scenes here that lead up to a real heart-breaking (yet thoroughly satisfying) finale that I won't soon forget.

Realistically written, addictive and eerie, it wouldn't surprise me in the least if this one gets picked up by a mainstream press.

Highly recommended.

The Good, the Bad, and the BLOODY

DEAD IN THE WEST by Joe R. Lansdale (2005 Night Shade Books / 148 pp. / hc)

I waited a long time to get my hands on this one, and thanks to a sale at one of my favorite online booksellers I finally managed to snag a copy of this gorgeous limited edition hardcover version of Lansdale's classic zombie western (the story originally appeared in 1986 as a 3-part series in Eldritch Tales Magazine then later as a softcover trade paperback). This is also the first time I've read Lansdale (don't shoot me--full pun intended), although I did see the film version of his book BUBBA HO-TEP (does that count?).

DEAD IN THE WEST is Lansdale's tribute to the pulp magazines of old. The simple plot involves an Indian's curse on a small town, and a drifting preacher (the sin-plagued Reverend Jebediah Mercer) who comes to Mud Creek not only to battle the living dead, but wrestle with his faith. The story moves lightning fast, and it's easy to see why Lansdale has such a devout following; even a story (that's basically a "been there, done that" midnight b-movie-on-paper) shines in his hands. His characters are rich, especially the relationship between the Rev. Jeb and a young boy named David (who becomes his gun-slinging protege'). And any writer who can get me interested in any type of Western gets my respect and admiration.

While zombie fans may not find too much new here (by way of the zombie stuff), no one can deny the brain-splattering fun level that's on display--and after all, what else would someone who buys a book titled DEAD IN THE WEST be looking for? However, in this case, there's a bit more than blood, guts, and gunplay; Lansdale takes a look at two different 'men of the cloth' and how each one deals with an unusual situation on spiritual as well as physical levels.

'Tis a true underground classic, and for me, the perfect introduction to an author I'm really looking forward to catching up with.

Quantum of Efficiency

I couldn’t leave work fast enough to get to an opening-day screening of the latest 007 flick. Being a maniacal fan of the series since my dad let me stay up to watch THUNDERBALL one Sunday night when I was in 1st grade, I still go nuts whenever a new one is released. Yet, I won’t praise one if it doesn’t deserve it (Never Say Never Again, anyone?) and I try to keep my fan-boy head on straight when reviewing one.

I actually saved reading four reviews until AFTER I saw the film (they being from the NY Post, the NY Daily News, The Village Voice, and Entertainment Weekly). The 2 NY papers’ reviews struck me as odd: Both gave QOS the very good rating of 3 out of 4 stars, yet seemed to rip the film apart in their commentaries (The Post calling it, “Bland. James Bland. We can only hope the next chapter will deliver something that would be as hot as Keith Olbermann’s temper,” while the Daily News said, “…underwhelmed Bond fans can take solace that James Bond will return, hopefully in a better movie.” (Huhn? WHY 3 stars then?) Entertainment Weekly (despite giving it a B), claims, “SOLACE is a cold and vengeful chapter in the James Bond saga with little interest in coherence,” and finally, The Village Voice proves (once again) that the main usefulness of its film section is to get theater info: their reviewer (who’s mother probably still writes his name in his underwear) called it an “unwatchable mess,” and “…easily one of the worst in the Bond pantheon.”

Despite the confusing NY newspaper and ET reviews (let alone the Voice’s waste of ink), I didn’t find QOS difficult to follow in the least—and it’s far from the worst in the series. In fact, if not for a ridiculous (yet exciting) skydive sequence (where a parachute opens about 10 feet from the ground, with Bond and his girl walking away unscratched), and a goofy, stoned-looking villain (I mean, an environmental terrorist? After all the nuts 007 has taken on over the years? Puh-Lease!), QOS delivers the goods on a scale ALMOST as good as CASINO ROYALE. The action scenes are relentless, which surprised me considering the opening pre-credits car chase scene was routine, 007 stuff (and I admit I had the feeling this one was going to feel much longer than its brief running time). Two staples that have made 007 films so addictive are the opening action pieces trying to outdo one another (just watch how they evolved, especially with each Roger Moore entry), as well as the introduction of Bond’s latest gadgets. While the gadgets are basically gone (as compared to the older films) the series really needs to keep the openings fresh, exciting, and ABOVE what has come before it. But after the opening titles, the action comes on a level that’ll make you forget about its standard beginning (and I actually enjoyed Jack White and Alicia Key’s title song).

But it’s Daniel Craig—stone-faced, brutal, and with MAYBE a quarter-inch of a conscience—who has proven to be one of the best actors to take on the role of James Bond, which in itself is some kind of miracle (especially to a 007 purist like myself). The above mentioned reviews also ragged how “pissed and mad” Craig’s Bond is throughout SOLACE, but given its plot (the film is almost like a re-telling of the underrated Timothy Dalton entry, LICENSE TO KILL), I didn’t have any trouble with 007 being continually ticked off—and it worked like a charm when—like in Casino Royale—there’s yet another spin on the series’ famous Martini-drinking scenes.

Another element that brought a smile to my face is a sequence at a huge outdoor opera, where various members of QUANTUM meet to discuss their evil plans (muhahahahahahaha!), only to have 007, standing above the stage, taking pictures of them on his spy-phone-cam after he alerts them that they really should’ve found “a better place to meet.” Bond is actually shown SPYING, something that (while it has) occurred in most bond films, has never been done as “neatly” as in SOLACE. It’s easy to forget that Bond—especially when he’s jumping across roofs like Spider Man—is a spy, and these latest two 007films do a great job of showing his human side, which is why (I believe) they’re both doing so well (QOS has already grossed over 200 million in Europe alone).

Despite the couple of minor flaws (we must remember this is only a MOVIE folks—something too many reviewers seem to forget), QUANTUM OF SOLACE can be watched back-to-back with CASINO ROYALE for an extended 007 adventure that’ll be remembered not only as two of the best 007 films, but as two of the best spy movies (in general).

My favorite moments:

-While ducking under a car, Bond does something that I always wondered why no one did in a similar situation: he shoots one of the men shooting at him in the leg, from underneath the car! (For that little detail alone the filmmakers get a huge “’atta-boy” from this film geek).

-Bond’s brief love (actually, sex) interest, known only as “Fields,” is found covered head to toe, face down on a bed in black oil---a wonderful nod to the 007 classic GOLDFINGER (‘know what I’m talking about?). Gotta love it.

-And what has to be one of the greatest descriptions of Bond himself (in the entire series), said by the beautiful Bolivian revenge-seeker Camille (played by Olga Kurylenko) when she comes across 007 for the second or third time in the film, “There’s something horribly efficient about you.”

What a PERFECT summation of this film.

SOLACE does what (real) Bond fans crave. It takes our minds off the world for a little while (like any good film should) and throws us on a roller coaster ride that—for some of us—is worth the painful wait between films.

And yet another GREAT debut novel this year...

MIDNIGHT ON MOURN STREET by Christopher Conlon (2008 Earthling Publications / 220 pp. / tp)

Mauri is an underage runaway with a brief but brutally obusive past. She currently turns tricks when she needs money, and with her multiple piercings, tattoos and newly-dyed green hair, she's attempting to put the death of her aunt Evie behind her (the only person she has ever had a close relationship with).

Reed Waters is a middle-aged man who has inherited a small fortune. He spends his days sharing his vast knowledge of classical music with young friend Will.

One night Reed hears someone whimpering in front of his house during a rain storm. He takes the young lady in and helps her get back on her feet.
And lest you think this is starting to sound like a Lifetime movie, just wait.
Author Conlon takes a simple premise (lost souls seeking closure) and plunges his two protagonists into an unforgiving, dark, relentless world that packs a level of emotion and heartbreak I haven't seen since Gary Braunbeck's IN SILENT GRAVES.

While I wouldn't consider MIDNIGHT ON MOURN STREET a "horror" novel, its stark tone and realism caused my heart to race several times, its prose so deep and disturbing I haven't felt this connected or interested in a pair of characters since I could remember.

The secrets in MOURN STREET unfold at an addictive pace that kept me glued to the pages, truly concerned for each characters' well-being. This dark, depressing, emotionally-charged rollercoaster ride reads like the work of a season vet, and I have a feeling I won't be forgetting it any time soon.

Christopher Conlon has surely set his own bar quite high. This is a MUST read/